Tuesday, December 05, 2006
In some moments, I am caught up in what I'm doing and everything feels fine. Then I suddenly feel PISSY. Then I crave CHOCOLATE (I saw some at a meeting I was at this a.m.). Then I feel really mad about the fact that some people can just send people they don't know to kill other people they don't know. And throughout the whole thing, I feel really spacey.
Winter fasting is cold. Hot water is appreciated.
When I was in massage school, a teacher suggested that we might try giving a practice session while in an altered state - maybe when we are sleep deprived. I took that suggestion to heart and gave a session after drinking a little too much wine. It was... well, probably not my best session. But I put my practice buddy to sleep and I had fun wwwooorrrkkkinnggg iiinnn rrreeaaalll ssssllllloooowwww mmmoootttiioonnn. Like, wow, man...
Don't know if I learned anything from that experience.
Today I am learning how much I am tempted to not take responsibility for my choices. And I would like to eat chocolate and forget about this fasting stuff. And I can be a big grouch on the inside (but, being the GOOD GIRL that I am, I try not to show it).
But I am also seeing my strengths - the gifts that I have that contribute to life on this planet. I'm feeling so much appreciation for the people who are in my life and the people who have lightly touched me as they passed by.