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Saturday, May 24, 2008
My Dad
My dad is going to turn 88 years old next week. He is a WWII vet. He served as a radar technician on a submarine in the South Pacific during the war.
If I would have been in one of those little subs during WWII, they would have had to put me away at some point. I can hardly breathe thinking about being in those cramped conditions under the water - with torpedoes speeding past.
My favorite memory of my dad comes from a ritual that we had when I was young. When it was time for me to go to bed, I would tell both of my parents goodnight, but with my dad's goodnight, I would add, "Will you come to my bed?". He would always say yes and would show up a few minutes after I had gotten all situated under the covers. When he arrived, I would ask him all kinds of questions - not because I cared about the answers so much, but because I wanted him to stay and talk to me.
Once, I remember asking him why I don't see colors in the dark. I'm sure that I asked him about the planets, and there is no doubt in my mind that I asked him about lightening. I was afraid of lightening and worried that it would strike the air conditioning unit that was in my bedroom window.
It meant so much to me to have that Carol and dad time as I grew up. The material gifts are mostly gone now - some are remembered and some aren't. But the gift of time spent together is a gift of love.
And as I've grown older and learned more about the world, I have come to appreciate that gift even more, because in addition to time, my dad gave me a safe place to be and grow. There are so many people who grew up wishing their dads hadn't come to their bed at night...
So blessings and happy birthday to my dad who was brave enough to serve in a submarine, who was patient enough to explain the world to me, who worked hard so that we had everything we needed, and who gave me reason to believe the world is a safe place.
If I would have been in one of those little subs during WWII, they would have had to put me away at some point. I can hardly breathe thinking about being in those cramped conditions under the water - with torpedoes speeding past.
My favorite memory of my dad comes from a ritual that we had when I was young. When it was time for me to go to bed, I would tell both of my parents goodnight, but with my dad's goodnight, I would add, "Will you come to my bed?". He would always say yes and would show up a few minutes after I had gotten all situated under the covers. When he arrived, I would ask him all kinds of questions - not because I cared about the answers so much, but because I wanted him to stay and talk to me.
Once, I remember asking him why I don't see colors in the dark. I'm sure that I asked him about the planets, and there is no doubt in my mind that I asked him about lightening. I was afraid of lightening and worried that it would strike the air conditioning unit that was in my bedroom window.
It meant so much to me to have that Carol and dad time as I grew up. The material gifts are mostly gone now - some are remembered and some aren't. But the gift of time spent together is a gift of love.
And as I've grown older and learned more about the world, I have come to appreciate that gift even more, because in addition to time, my dad gave me a safe place to be and grow. There are so many people who grew up wishing their dads hadn't come to their bed at night...
So blessings and happy birthday to my dad who was brave enough to serve in a submarine, who was patient enough to explain the world to me, who worked hard so that we had everything we needed, and who gave me reason to believe the world is a safe place.
Labels: Dad, Memorial Day
posted by Carol at 11:16 AM
10 Comments:
You know I am a bit of a big softie but this post hit me hard right in the heart. Every single word, every sentance, every paragraph is filled with love and I am lucky enough to say that I know that love you mention here so very well with my own dad. I'd say you were blessed and your dads' time and patience and love and care are testament to what a lovely, gracious and caring person you are today.
Birthday greeting to your dad! :o)
My grandfather was in the Pacific Fleet in WWII. He was pretty brave. He died young, of pancreatic cancer. I missed him for many years. Sometimes I still do.
Mom was always able to tell the story of World War II to my sister and I (when she was sober, at least). I was always fascenated by how she would tell it.
My birthday blessings to you dad, Carol. He sounds like quite a guy.
Thank you, daffy. You are very kind...
Your obvious love for your dad has worn off on me. :-)
Indigo,
I think the telling and listening of the stories from our parents' and grandparents' lives is very important. I guess that we'll be passing down stories as well before we know it.
Nick,
Thank you! Yeah... As I age, I'm seeing more and more about this man I call my dad.
Carol, this is priceless, beautiful. Thank you so much for writing this.
Hey Salihah!
How are you??? Thanks for stopping by!
Thanks for your kind words.
Carol, I envy your relationship with your dad. My father was rarely around and almost disappeared completely from my life after my parents divorce. I've tried to reconnect in recent years, but I'm lucky if I hear from him twice a year. In fact, the last two times I saw him were at my aunt's funeral and my grandmother's funeral. Sad.
Hey Robert!
That IS sad. A big loss for both of you. And for your kids. Knowing this about your dad, I appreciate even more the person and father that you are.
Thank you for helping me to remember how lucky I've been. My dad and I are polar opposites politically and in many other ways, but he's always been there for me and loved me.
I hope that your dad will connect with you more at some point...
Carol, this is beautiful. I'm sorry to be getting to it a little late. You are so right: there are those who dreaded their father coming to their bed, and of course there are those who wished their father had been around even a little.
Happy belated birthday to a wonderful father who helped form the beautiful, strong, peaceful Carol we know today.
How did he answer your question about colors in the dark?
Hey San!
Thanks for your sweet comments.
My memory about the color question is that he said something about that it takes light to make color. I'm sure that the answer was MUCH more detailed than that. Mostly I just wanted him to spend time with me...
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