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Saturday, June 14, 2008
This Is My Brain With No Sugar
I haven't had any sugar, anything with any sugar-like substances in it or any starches for FOUR DAYS. No CHOCOLATE, no breads, rice, fruits... Of my five favorite snacks, I've only had the pleasure of one choice. Nuts. Which is maybe what I am right now.
And my brain is mush. I have screwed up a bunch of things today. Example: I went to the grocery store, selected my VEGETABLES (since that's about all I'm eating right now), put everything on the conveyor belt it so it could be beeped over the noisy scanner, then reached into my pocket to find no $$$, no credit card, nothing but my driver's license and a little lint.
I did stand in the heat out at our Women in Black vigil (I was late because of the above little adventure). We are coming upon three years of standing at this particular vigil.
And the occupation continues.
4,099 U.S. soldiers, many more soldiers from other countries, and countless Iraqis are dead from this atrocity.
I like this quote below (taken from the book Callings: Finding and Following an Authentic Life by Gregg Levoy):
That last line is the answer to almost everything. When we fall in love (and I'm not talking about being in love WITH SOMEONE - even though that can be a part of it, too. I'm talking about being in love, being love), we don't want to harm the earth or any of its inhabitants. And it's not about judging that anything or anyone is worthy of our love, it's just about CHOOSING to love.
Maybe I'll think about this differently once I've fed my sugar-deprived brain some chocolate or something.
But I doubt it.
And my brain is mush. I have screwed up a bunch of things today. Example: I went to the grocery store, selected my VEGETABLES (since that's about all I'm eating right now), put everything on the conveyor belt it so it could be beeped over the noisy scanner, then reached into my pocket to find no $$$, no credit card, nothing but my driver's license and a little lint.
I did stand in the heat out at our Women in Black vigil (I was late because of the above little adventure). We are coming upon three years of standing at this particular vigil.
And the occupation continues.
4,099 U.S. soldiers, many more soldiers from other countries, and countless Iraqis are dead from this atrocity.
I like this quote below (taken from the book Callings: Finding and Following an Authentic Life by Gregg Levoy):
Mark Dubois once asked a friend of his, a city planner in Moscow who worked as an environmentalist in Mikhail Gorbachev's government, how they could get more people involved in saving the environment.
"First," his friend responded, "I think it is important that one fall in love."
That last line is the answer to almost everything. When we fall in love (and I'm not talking about being in love WITH SOMEONE - even though that can be a part of it, too. I'm talking about being in love, being love), we don't want to harm the earth or any of its inhabitants. And it's not about judging that anything or anyone is worthy of our love, it's just about CHOOSING to love.
Maybe I'll think about this differently once I've fed my sugar-deprived brain some chocolate or something.
But I doubt it.
"Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence."
Henry Louis Mencken
Henry Louis Mencken
Labels: Iraq War, love, Women in Black
posted by Carol at 2:39 PM
8 comments
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Love
Then
I lived in Arkansas for two years when I was in my early twenties. At one point, the cutest black and white hound dog came into my life. He was about six months old and had HUGE paws and the most juicy jowls of any dog I'd met. I named him Jethro, because, well, he WAS a Jethro. I wish that I had one of my old photos of him scanned so that I could post it here.
Jethro and I were best buds. He could read my thoughts, so verbal communication was not necessary.
We had no fence and Jethro would hang out inside or our "around" the house. He never went far. But he must have done some neighborly visiting, because we accumulated a fine collection of socks, boots and dolls that he brought home from somewhere...
This sweet, sweet hound was a fine gentleman and took good care of the women in the neighborhood. The neighbor who lived behind us told us that when she left our house to go home, Jethro would walk her to her fence, then turn around and go back home. Another neighbor - an elderly woman - told us that when she walked to the grocery store down the street, Jethro would walk her there, wait for her, and walk her home.
Jethro left us for the big doggy heaven over 20 years ago.
God, I loved that dog (I write with tears running down my cheeks).
Now
This is Buddha.
He's waiting for my friend and me, because he won't go anywhere if either Mr. CarolForPeace or I lag behind.
I lived in Arkansas for two years when I was in my early twenties. At one point, the cutest black and white hound dog came into my life. He was about six months old and had HUGE paws and the most juicy jowls of any dog I'd met. I named him Jethro, because, well, he WAS a Jethro. I wish that I had one of my old photos of him scanned so that I could post it here.
Jethro and I were best buds. He could read my thoughts, so verbal communication was not necessary.
We had no fence and Jethro would hang out inside or our "around" the house. He never went far. But he must have done some neighborly visiting, because we accumulated a fine collection of socks, boots and dolls that he brought home from somewhere...
This sweet, sweet hound was a fine gentleman and took good care of the women in the neighborhood. The neighbor who lived behind us told us that when she left our house to go home, Jethro would walk her to her fence, then turn around and go back home. Another neighbor - an elderly woman - told us that when she walked to the grocery store down the street, Jethro would walk her there, wait for her, and walk her home.
Jethro left us for the big doggy heaven over 20 years ago.
God, I loved that dog (I write with tears running down my cheeks).
Now
This is Buddha.He's waiting for my friend and me, because he won't go anywhere if either Mr. CarolForPeace or I lag behind.
Buddha has been in our family for eleven years. When we went looking for him, I knew that we would either find a Gandhi or a Buddha. As we arrived at the shelter, a sweet black puppy with a spotted white chest was so excited to see us that we had to check him out. The woman at the shelter brought him out of his little cage and he sat down, leaning back against her and crossing his paws over his belly. The woman, without knowing my ideas for a name, said "Oh, look at the little Buddha!"
So, of course, we brought him home where he belonged and named him Buddha. He IS a Buddha after all.
Now this elder wise dog reads my thoughts so no verbal communication is necessary. He is my hiking buddy. He is my shadow, following me EVERYWHERE I go. He will do anything to please me. He teaches me to let go of things and to be in the moment. He is deep in my heart. Every morning, he sits right in front of me with a very serious look and expects his neck massage, which I very willingly give him for as long as he wants.
God, I love this dog (I write with tears running down my cheeks.)
So, of course, we brought him home where he belonged and named him Buddha. He IS a Buddha after all.
Now this elder wise dog reads my thoughts so no verbal communication is necessary. He is my hiking buddy. He is my shadow, following me EVERYWHERE I go. He will do anything to please me. He teaches me to let go of things and to be in the moment. He is deep in my heart. Every morning, he sits right in front of me with a very serious look and expects his neck massage, which I very willingly give him for as long as he wants.
God, I love this dog (I write with tears running down my cheeks.)
posted by Carol at 8:03 AM
17 comments
Saturday, April 05, 2008
Gratitudes and Attitudes
San of "A Life with a View" awarded me this coveted prize - the Gratitude with Attitude Award. Or I should say she twirled and dervished, and mine was one of the blogs that the gods of randomosity put before her when her spinning stopped.First, before my humble acceptance speech, I want to tell you about San. She is a gifted artist and writer. I want to visit her gallery the next time I head south. I wish I had her creative eye and could see home furnishings in the disguise of rusty, discarded car doors. My medicine cabinets are 1950's cheap, standard issue, un-memorable, utilitarian things on the wall. San's medicine cabinet is art.
San woke up yesterday feeling good with gratitude in her heart. Maybe it's because she can see art in all things. I don't. I don't usually wake up feeling good and I don't see art in all things. I have more attitude than gratitude.
Nothing comes without a good opportunity either blatantly wrapped around it or quietly lodged deep inside. San's award was stunning to me, because I have not been real happy the past few days. How awful can it be to be given an award from a smiley happy person when I feel like a frowning furry monster?
And it's springtime, for God's sake!
When I was on retreat, there were twelve other two-legged friends in cabins of their own. I could choose to see them a couple of hours every morning for teachings if I wanted, or I could stay at my place and enjoy the four-legged friends that stopped by. I did a little of both. I would've been happy to have stayed alone the entire time, but I happened to read a book I found on a shelf that was titled Gratefulness, the Heart of Prayer. It was a good book. Since I was spending time not only looking out from these eyes at the beauty around me, but also into these eyes to find out who is in here, I checked out the area in me labeled "Gratefulness" and found the room very sparsely furnished.
Something had to be done about that.
I began to think of the other participants, and haiku poems for each of them flowed from my hand onto old pieces of wood I found scattered around my wood-pile. After I had written a few of those, I got all excited to go to the next day's teachings so that I could hand out my offerings.
Yesterday after receiving San's award, I started writing thank you notes for all the food and flowers that my friends have given me during my recovery.
I do better calling this love. And I think that it comes naturally for me outdoors. It's just everywhere, infiltrating every atom. Indoors, I have to work on it a little. I have to reach out. Not too natural for me, but that's OK.
If you have read this far and want to accept this award for yourself, grab it. Make it yours. Let its opportunity wrap around you or go deep inside, if you'd like.
posted by Carol at 8:02 AM
8 comments
Friday, February 01, 2008
U2 3D
Buddha With 3D GlassesWishes That He Could've Seen U2 in 3D
If you like U2, I highly highly highly recommend their concert movie that just came out in 3D. I haven't seen a 3D movie since the 70's.
We planned to go a show that started at 9:30 and I was really tired so I almost decided not to go. Also, I have never paid $13.50 to go to a movie, so we wondered if it would be worth it.
Well, as soon as the show started, I was no longer tired. I smiled the entire hour and 25 minutes. And I want to go back and do it again, no matter what it costs.
I am not a reviewer, so I will offer a pro's view stolen from IMDB below. But before I do, I want to say that I wish that we could have a prez that would speak of, and work toward, social justice like Bono does. I long for the day when a prez can bring people together with the passion, unity, and love that I saw on the faces of those packed into U2's audience.
Eliot Van Buskirk's Wired report -
If you've made it this far, here's a link to the U2 3D trailer. I didn't embed it, because I don't think it does the movie justice. You can find out if it is going to show near you on the U2 3D site.
We planned to go a show that started at 9:30 and I was really tired so I almost decided not to go. Also, I have never paid $13.50 to go to a movie, so we wondered if it would be worth it.
Well, as soon as the show started, I was no longer tired. I smiled the entire hour and 25 minutes. And I want to go back and do it again, no matter what it costs.
I am not a reviewer, so I will offer a pro's view stolen from IMDB below. But before I do, I want to say that I wish that we could have a prez that would speak of, and work toward, social justice like Bono does. I long for the day when a prez can bring people together with the passion, unity, and love that I saw on the faces of those packed into U2's audience.
Eliot Van Buskirk's Wired report -
"With 3-D glasses trained on the Imax screen at the Luxor Casino in Las Vegas, I felt I was experiencing more of the U2 concert from my theater chair than I would have in person. Chalk it up to the impossible camera angles, the breathtaking close-ups and panoramas, or the convincing nature of the latest 3-D technology, but I was really there: watching guitarist-keyboardist The Edge play a Fender Rhodes from a vantage point 4 feet above his head, seeing lead singer Bono's hand reach out to the crowd, and flying through a massive stadium lit up by thousands of cellphones waving in unison like a school of glowing sea creatures.
"The capacity crowds filling these South American soccer stadiums go absolutely mad for the music of U2. Their hands wave to the beat just a few feet in front of you. Their enthusiasm is wildly infectious.
"Every development in the history of cinema has always been about making the experience more realistic, whether going from silent to talkies, or black-and-white to color," said John Rodell, the producer I spoke with outside the theater. "We see the world in 3-D, so this is a natural progression, now that the technological limitations have been conquered."
"The 3-D format goes a long way toward making the movie great, but the film would not have been nearly as powerful with the cameras pointed at most other bands. U2's musicians are masterful performers, and the epic nature of their songs and stage act lends itself perfectly to larger-than-life treatment.
"Still, watching a movie is a passive experience; to keep viewers fully engaged for more than an hour, Sassoon Film Design added a smattering of clever visual effects somewhat reminiscent of the square that Uma Thurman's character draws in the air in 'Pulp Fiction'. Post-production staffers also added animated versions of U2's backdrop videos - most notably a series of icons suggesting that the world's major religions are one. To capture multiple band members in the same frame, the filmmakers added as many as five 3-D layers to the final cut.
"Other than that, U2 3D includes little visual or audio trickery. The band insisted that no audio overdubs be included; every note in the film was played live (although for on-stage close-ups, U2 agreed to be filmed playing one show to an empty stadium). "I could make my cat sound like a good singer with Pro Tools," said Rodell, "but we didn't use any of that. What you see there are those guys, playing that night, in front of 90,000 people."
If you've made it this far, here's a link to the U2 3D trailer. I didn't embed it, because I don't think it does the movie justice. You can find out if it is going to show near you on the U2 3D site.
As a rock star, I have two instincts, I want to have fun, and I want to change the world. I have a chance to do both. - Bono
posted by Carol at 9:17 AM
6 comments
Saturday, December 15, 2007
Do you ever wonder why Love takes the time to paint beauty all around us?
In the grayest days, Love's gentle breath still leaves its evidence everywhere.
In the grayest days, Love's gentle breath still leaves its evidence everywhere.
Let your teacher be love itself. - Rumi
Labels: love, photography, Rumi
posted by Carol at 4:08 PM
0 comments
Sunday, November 25, 2007
Thanksgiving, Day 7
6. This moment
5. A touch
4. This breath
3. To see
2. The Source of all, no matter what we choose to call it. That which is unity, peace, and
1. LOVE
5. A touch
4. This breath
3. To see
2. The Source of all, no matter what we choose to call it. That which is unity, peace, and
1. LOVE
Labels: love, photography
posted by Carol at 10:11 AM
3 comments
Sunday, October 28, 2007
I am finding that
I can no longer afford
I can no longer afford
the shut-off and hardened
places inside myself
that are created
when I hate, judge or distance.
Aliveness can only come from love.
Labels: love, photography
posted by Carol at 11:18 AM
3 comments
Sunday, June 10, 2007
Indian Slum Girl "Makes Good"
Just when I was working on a blues poem about my writing/world/life/political burn-out...
I came across this moving article about an illiterate man in India who works for $2/day, but scrimped to help put his wife through school and university studies so that she could fulfill her dream of becoming an engineer.
Shaikh Salary and his wife, Fatima, were wed in an arranged marriage when Fatima was only 15. Her parents took her out of school, believing that no girl from the slums could ever become an engineer. But Salary supported Fatima in her dream, and now that engineering school is behind her, Fatima will soon be working for a top information technology company and making $600/month.
From the article, Indian Slum Girl "Makes Good":
"Salary was pleased for his wife, and told Al Jazeera that it was their love for each other that had helped them achieve their goal." This is big in an area where young women are expected to forgo education in order to stay home and raise a family.
Don't have time for no blues - and the poem wasn't that good anyway...
I came across this moving article about an illiterate man in India who works for $2/day, but scrimped to help put his wife through school and university studies so that she could fulfill her dream of becoming an engineer.
Shaikh Salary and his wife, Fatima, were wed in an arranged marriage when Fatima was only 15. Her parents took her out of school, believing that no girl from the slums could ever become an engineer. But Salary supported Fatima in her dream, and now that engineering school is behind her, Fatima will soon be working for a top information technology company and making $600/month.
From the article, Indian Slum Girl "Makes Good":
"Salary was pleased for his wife, and told Al Jazeera that it was their love for each other that had helped them achieve their goal." This is big in an area where young women are expected to forgo education in order to stay home and raise a family.
Don't have time for no blues - and the poem wasn't that good anyway...
Labels: inspiration, love
posted by Carol at 4:10 PM
1 comments
Thursday, May 03, 2007
Monday, May 15, 2006
Watching My Mind
funny how i find
love
when I watch a person give
peace
when the sound of water washes my soul
courage
when I do something I thought I couldn't
yet I can forget all of that in a moment
hope
can fade away leaving darkness and
despair
when reading the current news
sadness
at humanity's blindness
it's all a choice
thoughts are only thoughts
not truths
feelings change with the winds
only faster
watch the mind's circus and
let go
posted by Carol at 10:47 PM
0 comments